A Journey To Texas – Part 5

Yo, this is a series. Read the others first!

Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4

Around this time, unbeknownst to me, the rest of the crew ventured back to the wood bar because the final bar sucked. Eric and Jared were on the upper balcony on the opposite side as me, sitting at a table. Eric wasn’t feeling too well, and Jared was attending to him. Eric’s body had decided it needed to purge, and Eric was far to drunk to do anything about it. He puked all over the table in front of him. Normally this wouldn’t have been an issue, but this particular table had a mesh surface and the vom-bomb dripped straight through it. It coated Eric’s pants and shoes and dripped down the patio to the people below. With quick thinking, Jared, moved Eric downstairs with Mouse and Scott to avoid any drunken puke covered Texans.

Now, I had tried to use the empty glass excuse several times to get away from the sea cow and her friends, but she always demanded that she refill it for me. I tried three or four times, before I realized that it wasn’t going to work. After I attempted this, I started to consider going home with the sea cow, just for the free cab ride. I was in no condition to find our car and make the trip back to the hotel. Finally, it hit me like the full thunderous force of Niagara Falls. I had to pee. The perfect excuse to leave the sea cow behind! I got up and promised I would be right back after I drained the lizard.

I darted downstairs and found Mouse, “WE HAVE GOT TO GO!!” I shouted. Mouse was baffled and groping for an explanation.


Finally Mouse realized there was no explanation needed. He ran off to find the rest of the group who had moved on. I sat at the bar eagerly awaiting their return so I could leave the sea cow behind. As I sat, I heard the moans of the sea cow from the balcony stairs. I had to leave and I had to leave now. I went onto the porch to buy a few more seconds.

I saw Mouse; he was running towards me, he knew an urgent situation when he saw it. Mouse informed that me that Scott wasn’t ready to go and Eric couldn’t make the walk because he was too drunk. He said we had to get the car and drive back to pick them up. This plan sounded good to me, so I told Mouse I would meet him out front and jumped the wall.

Outside I nervously waited for Mouse to close his tab. I thought the sea cow had seen me jump the wall and was probably on her way out to find me. Thankfully, Mouse was quick and came out. We set out at a brisk pace in the general direction of the car. I explained what had happened to Mouse and he was very understanding, but at the same time thought it was hilarious. I couldn’t blame him. As we continued to walk, we both realized that we had no idea how to get back to the car. We asked a guy that was standing on a corner if he could help us.

He asked us what we were looking for, we roughly tried to explain the parking garage and general area to him, but he didn’t know where it was. His friend he was with went off to hook up with some girl and ditched him, so he vowed to help us find our car. How a complete stranger would help us find our car was beyond me – he had no idea where we parked other than the general direction and didn’t know what it looked like from our drunken explanations, but we were glad to have him on board. We began to talk as we walked and it turned out that he was an OSU graduate and was working in Austin for a computer company. We got onto the subject of homebrew beer and he mentioned that a friend of his brews and sells it at a bar. He insisted that we go to the bar and try it, since I was such a huge fan of beer. Mouse and I tried to refuse, but in the end decided. Fuck It.

This guy took us to a small hole in the wall bar. The floors were dirty and made of wood, the lighting was dim and yellow, the tables were old and rickety, and the bar was scratched and scraped. It looked just like a bar out of the old west, the only thing missing were the swinging doors. We took a seat next to a couple of guys playing poker, I kept expecting one of them to stand up, yell “You fucking cheater!” and pull out a revolver.

Our stranger came back to the table bearing three homebrewed beers from the owner of the bar, Mouse refused, as he was sobering up for the drive. This left myself and the other guy with a three beers. Thinking of Eric, I wanted to leave this place as soon as possible, we had already been gone for what seemed like and hour. I planned on finishing this beer and leaving, so as not to be rude. I tasted it, it was the most bitter and tart beer I had ever tasted. It was horrible. The stranger asked me what I thought of it, so I lied and said I loved it. He proceeded to tell me about the brewing of the beer, all of which I ignored, as I took huge gulps to finish it quickly so we could be on our way.

I finished my beer and sat the glass down. As I was standing up to tell this guy we had to go, he poured half the other beer into my glass and proclaimed, “Man you MUST really love this stuff.”

I chugged the rest of it right there in the middle of this old west bar. I felt like brawling with the cowboys, but instead I grabbed Mouse’s arm and told the stranger we had to leave. He wished us good luck in finding our car and on our way we went. Somehow we managed to find the car in about 40 minutes. We made the climb up the parking garage to the second highest floor. The stair climb was so exhausting; it felt like climbing a mountain. Thankfully, by this time Mouse was sober enough to drive and we took off.

Mouse and I had a conversation on the way to pick up the rest of the crew, none of which I can remember, the rest of the car ride back to the hotel is merely a blur.

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